Monday :The World no longer fits me

Monday Meditation: The World no longer fits me

This world that I see does not fit me.  It is too small for my true stature. Too rigid for the flow of passion running through me. Too poor for my imagination.

This world that I inhabit does not suit me.  How did I get here? The suit does not fit the wearer!

This world that I perceive falls short of my desire. It leaves my wonder aimlessly wandering, hungry for the miracles I smell in the underbrush.

The question is this:

If I can smell the miracles, why am I not living them?

If I can desire more, why don’t I enjoy more?

If I am bigger, why is this suit too small?

If inside me a vast river flows with the wild  potency of life, why do I seat here, boxed by routine?

If my imagination is rich, why am I poor?

If I am conscious of my greatness, what must I do to step into it?

How do I take off this old raggedy dress that no longer fits me?

And then…

Then what?

Then I stay naked.

Naked?

Naked. Empty. Silent. Unknown to myself.

Walking into nothingness.

Naked? Nothing?

No wonder I’m still wearing this dress.

Tiny it may be. But it’s familiar.

But I want more!

And therein lays the problem:

My soul is breaking through the seams.

I am Pregnant with myself.

Soon the rags will fall.

Here. Let me help.

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Maria Mar

May 2, 2014

New York

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