Naysayers, Haters, Mirrors and Messengers
The other day I was watching a video by Jeff Walker. I love this person! He shines with authenticity and love, and he says it as it is. You can watch the video here.
I warn you that this is a long post, but if you offer or want to offer your gifts to the world, or if you have been held back by the fear of criticism, I promise that it is worth your while to read.
I agree with Jeff that one of the things that is holding many of us back is the fear of being rejected, judged, criticized and even “crucified” by others; especially by our loved ones ~but also by influential people or large groups.
That fear of criticism is like a barb-wire fence that blocks many paths to success, especially among women and Spiritual Creatives.
We all have been the victims of that horrific infestation: Gossip. We know what that does. It spreads like toxic gas even before you get to a place, and when you enter everyone is looking at you as if you had axed aunt Annie. LOL!
Once people get a second-hand impression of you they cannot see the real you. It is painful to try to communicate with someone who cannot see or hear you because they have been poisoned by someone else’s gossip about you.
But when we long to step into our greatness, to embody our purpose or become our Dream, the fear can quickly escalate into terror because we are afraid not about ONE person gossiping about us, but about an entire POPULATION spreading evil thoughts that ruin our life.
So we hold back. We give our power away. We play safe and small.
And that, I believe is what Jeff wants to help us heal.
However, there are lessons to hear here, and generalizing that those who say “negative” things about our services or messages are “haters” can blind us to powerful gifts that the Divine is bringing to us.
It can make us throw away the baby with the bassinet, so to speak.
So I’ve been tracking down what bothered me about that message and what Spirit wanted me –and you– to know, and now I’m ready to share it.
Nay, it’s not them, I Say it’s you!
The first problem you face when you are afraid of naysayers and haters is not THEM.
It is YOU.
- Why don’t you think of the many people who can benefit from your work?
- Why don’t you find motivation in the problems you can help solve, the people you can inspire, the new adventures you can live?
Because you are placing your attention in negative expectations. You are trapped in old, learned and limiting expectations; your Primary Expectations.
And here’s the thing:
You may even be attached to those who reject you and blind to those who accept you.
So the first thing you need to do is release the learned limiting expectations of being rejected, judged and shamed. Follow them to their source, parent that Wounded Inner Child and shift your attention from those who (you expect to) reject you to those who will receive you, need you and are right now looking for you.
Understand that I am not saying it’s your fault or that negative, envious people don’t exist or that if you shift your attention and detach from these expectations you are not going to run into them.
No. They exist, and we all bump into them. But if they are affecting you, intimidating you, making you feel bad or worse… stopping you from your dream or potential, then the problem is not them. It’s you. You are giving your power away to them.
This article is designed to help you understand why and release it so that you become unstoppable.
Next: Naysayers: are they all that bad?